19 Kinds of Guys Who Just Aren't Worth Your Time

1. The guy who texts you every day for a week then disappears for ten days only to resurface and text you like everything's normal. "Sorry, busy at work. How r u?" Breaking news: if he has enough time to go to the bathroom he has enough time to send you a text message because youknow he looked at his phone when he was in there.

2. The guy who gives you backhanded compliments. "You look hot with your hair straight." "You look so great on Instagram." He may as well tell you he only likes you after your face has been filtered so that it looks like he's viewing you through wax paper. Why should you have to do that or spend a hour at a salon and $80 to live up to his standards? Oh, that's right, you don't!

3. The guy who tries to get you not to use a condom. This guy is a roach on your apartment floor. Spray him with Raid and flush him down the toilet because that's what a guy who cares that little about your personal wishes and health deserves.

4. The guy who won't go down on you but expects blow jobs. Your life isn't a janky porn movie he watches on his iPhone when he wakes up in the morning. And if he doesn't understand that he shouldn't be in it.

5. The guy who doesn't know what he wants. If he can't make up his mind about the best thing that ever happened to him (you) he's an idiot. You deserve a man with a sense of direction and, oh right, a brain.

6. The guy who is incapable of making plans. "Hi, I'm in the area, still want to meet up today?" "Maybe. I'm at my friend's place watching Batman." #$*@(&#$ If he can't meet you for lunch on a Sunday imagine what introducing him to your parents or trying to take a vacation with him will be like.

7. The guy who acts like he's in love with you and then posts a photo of him and another girl he's clearly also dating to Facebook the next day. It's like he wanted you to see it — he friended you. Well you didn't sign up for a menage a trois or getting dicked around by someone who cares so little about having you around that he's basically advertising that he's seeing other people

8. The guy who never introduces you to his friends but he's met all your friends and perhaps your family when they've visited you. Note: here's a good rule to live by: see if he introduces you to his friends/family first — if he does, he's serious about dating you. If he doesn't, he's just toying with you and you will get hurt in the end.

9. The guy who will never commit, which you're aware of, yet you keep dating because you think he's hot and because maybe you're a touch sadistic. Look, if the hottest of the hottest guysgods aka Chris Hemsworth can settle down, so can the plebian you're dating. So if he committing isn't his thing, then committing to him isn't yours either.

10. The guy who only texts and never calls. Texts are for people who fear verbal communication and want an easy way to drop off the face of the earth for a week if they feel like it. Why would you want to be with a guy who can't even TALK to you? Easy: you don't!

11. The guy who never seems to have any cash. "Can you grab dinner/this cab fare/the movie tickets again?" You may be sweet but you're not that sweet and therefore you're not his sugar mama. If you work hard for your money you deserve a man who also works hard for his.

12. The guy who's really good at being manipulative — to the point where you don't even know you're being manipulated. He's a smooth operator and no, he is not a member of the English group Sade. He's probably a narcissist or a sociopath or has more baggage than anyone else you've ever met. Remember that his bad behavior is about him, not you, and move on.

13. The guy who always makes plans but then never follows through. Which means he probably sucks at bowling, playing darts, golfing, and throwing a football because all of these things require, say it with me, follow through. If he can't follow through on dinner, he's a flake, and he could just as easily flake on your life if you tried to build one with him.

14. The guy who is charming and tries to take you home with him. But when you tell him you're not going home with him because he could be an ax murderer and you want him to call you tomorrow instead, you never hear from him again.

15. The guy who's Instagram feed is full of bottle girls and some da club. His life goal is probably "banging a ton of chicks" and he only goes out with "aspiring models." Because looks are sopermanent.

16. The guy who wears a jersey outside of his house. Unless you are a wide receiver (or any position on a pro sports team), please leave your jersey at home. It's not clothing. You deserve a man who wears clothing.

17. The guy who is, like, 34 about to turn 35 and still can't get his shit together and commit to an exclusive relationship with you. Even though he tells you he loves you and wants to be with you. He's not actually confused, he's just lying at this point.

18. The guy that says he an adult/mature and ready to commit but when you bring up getting engaged, etc., he says something like, "Wait, I feel like we're moving too fast?"Really, buddy? "Here's an idea, take off that diaper you have on and put on your big boy pants because we've been dating for [insert a significant amount of years] and no one's getting any younger here."

19. The guy who is 30 and can't afford his own rent. If you go home with him, you will also find yourself in the presence of his three other roommates, his Nintendo 64, and a fridge full of Pabst Blue Ribbon. And don't think for a second that you're going to sleep on a real bed with a headboard — his mattress is probably on the floor and next to a pile of dirty clothes. You, a woman who DOES have hershit together, do not have time for this.

15 Things Only Giant Hypochondriacs Will Understand

1. You basically turn to Google the moment anything in your body feels slightly off-kilter.Even when it's period pains, which you've been experiencing for half your life already.

2. You constantly doubt the credentials of doctors that completely ignore your own self-diagnosis and tell you you're in good health.

They're just jealous because Dr. Google clearly knows more than them. And now you're paying the price for their insecurity WITH YOUR LIFE.

3. You're never quite sure if you just sleepy or if you're exhibiting symptoms of chronic fatigue syndrome.

It's such a fine line.

4. The moment of sheer panic when you realize you forgot to put painkillers in your handbag.

You immediately cancel all social plans until you can locate Advil. You never know when a migraine might strike.

5. Suffering through a hangover is a nightmare for all involved.You're almost too afraid to drink in case you overdo it and then choke on your sick in your sleep. (Almost).

6. You hyperventilate when your friends act on the unbearably risky '10 second rule' and eat food they've dropped on the floor.

Eating a wayward M&M is definitely grounds for re-evaluating a friendship.

7. Some people like theme parks. You would give anything for a ride in a CT scan machine.

Then you could finally sleep at night. If it wasn't for that pesky self-diagnosed insomnia, of course.

8. You have pregnancy scares ridiculously regularly.

"My period is 40 minutes late." *Rushes to CVS for a pregnancy test*

9. You've had at least 50 near death experiences. Maybe even more. They just seem to find you.

"Mom, the cat bit me and now I probably have rabies and am going to die."

10. When someone at work is sick but they think they're being heroic by coming in anyway, spritzing phlegm on everything in a 10-foot radius, you want to hit them.

Go home, you germy, germy mess.

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11. Because having a cold is debilitating and turns you into a depressed angry snotty pathetic mess. Not to mention the anxiety of knowing, deep down, it's something way more serious than a cold.

"I'm telling you, its diphtheria. Just kill me now and get it over with."

12. Any sudden changes in your body temperature make you instantly fear the worst."Why am I having a hot flash? IT'S THE MENOPAUSE and I'm only 24! Oh. The sun's just come out. My bad."

13. Your mind has its own complex way of translating your symptoms.It's not a headache, it's a migraine. It's not gas, it's appendicitis. It's not backache, it's kidney failure. (Probs.)

14. You have so many bottles of hand sanitizer around the house. And in your handbag. And at your office. And just everywhere. Because bacteria is everywhere.

"KILL THE GERMS"

15. You've written your will so many times, because you know you'll experience a tragic accident or illness sooner or later. You just know.

"So you can have my CDs…and you can have my iPad… and you can have my much-cherished hand sanitizer collection…"

It's a stressful life for a hypochondriac. But waking up unexpectedly alive each day makes every day all the more special.

10 Easy Ways to Look Instantly Less Frumpy

1. Wear your vest on top of your coat, so everyone can see it.

It's a great way to dress up a basic, inexpensive jacket. Choose a puffer in a bright color for a fun, sporty look, or go glam with fur or feathers.


On the right: Gray Wool Coat, H&M, $80; Blue Plaid Top, JOIE (Available at Bloomingdale's), $181; Blue Plaid Skirt, JOIE (Available at Bloomingdale's), $157; Transparent Loafers, JEFFREY CAMPBELL, $135; Navy Fur Vest, CLUB MONACO, $199; Black Shoulder Bag, COACH, $425

2. Pull your jogger pants down around your hips, instead of wearing them up around your waist.


Joggers, drawstring pants, and silk pajama pants are meant to be worn low across your hips, not up around your natural waist. Keep your top loose and blousy, then add some structure and sophistication with a tailored jacket, high heels and a boxy bag.



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On the right: White and Red Striped Button Down, H&M, $60; White Blazer Dress, BCBGMAXAZRIA, $298; Black Perforated Leather Joggers, CLUB MONACO, $160; Black-and-White Printed Sandal Heels, CLUB MONACO, $199; Leopard Printed Shoulder Bag, COACH, $795; Gold Triangle Prism Earrings, SARAH MAGID, $148; Gold Pave Crystal Ring, NOIR, $75

3. Emphasize your waist, even in a shapeless sack dress.++



You don't have to wear something tight or cinch in your waist to create a flattering silhouette. Layer a cropped jacket over an otherwise shapeless dress for instant waist emphasis without a belt.


On the right: White Dress With Zipper Details, ASOS, $57; Strappy Black Booties, CIRCUS BY SAM EDELMAN, $91; Cropped Black Leather Moto Jacket, NASTY GAL, $88; Light Pink and Black Buckle Bag, NASTY GAL x NILA ANTHONY, $48; Gold Geometric Cuff, CC SKYE (Available at Glam Boutique), $195; Black and Gold Arrow Earrings, NOIR, $60; Gold Necklace With Stone Pendant, BAUBLE BAR, $36

4. Give your jeans a rest.

Wearing an oversize sweater with a pair of skinny jeans is so boring! Add a hefty dose of romance and glamour to that big, cozy sweater by layering it over a long, flowing dress or skirt. You'll still flatter your figure but the overall look will be more comfortable and infinitely more beautiful.


On the right: Black V-Neck Sweater, EXPRESS, $50; Black Lace Skirt, FREE PEOPLE (Available at Bloomingdale's),$128; Black Stretch Sandal Heels, CLUB MONACO, $199; Stone Statement Collar, A PEACE TREATY, $298; Two-Tone Stone Gold Cuff, LELE SADOUGHI, $195; Studded Black and Silver Cuff, DANNIJO, $395

5. Play with proportions to make your outfit sexier and more fun.

Instead of a basic, hip-length sweater, try layering a cropped sweater over a woven top or blouse. Then switch out those basic black tights for a pair of over-the-knee socks. Layer a pair of sheer, nude tights underneath, and it will look like you are flashing a little bit of skin even though you will actually be completely covered up.


On the right: Black-and-White Miniskirt, ALICE + OLIVIA (Available at Bloomingdale's), $198; Black Pumps, JEFFREY CAMPBELL, $145; Black Over-the-Knee Socks, AMERICAN APPAREL, $13; Cream Cropped Sweater, CLUB MONACO, $140; White Silk Top, CLUB MONACO, $150; Black and Gold Studded Crossbody Bag, MILLY,$245; Gold Embellished Pendant Necklace, CC SKYE (Available at Glam Boutique), $185; Gold Pearl Necklace, LELE SADOUGHI, $265; Gold Three-Ring Stack, CC SKYE (Available at Glam Boutique), $175; Gold Hexagon-Shaped Ring, GORJANA, $58; Gold Bar Ring, HOUSE OF HARLOW 1960 (Available at Glam Boutique), $58
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6. Don't let one awesome accessory completely dominate your outfit.

It's easy to fall in love with an amazing pair of shoes or a fun bag when you are out shopping, but actually wearing them can be a little intimidating. The easiest thing to do is just wear all black and call it a day, but then your whole outfit becomes about that one accessory. Suddenly your shoes are the star of your outfit, when that role should be played by you.

Keep the black dress, but add a little white to help break up all that black and add a few more fun, colorful accessories into the mix to help balance your look and distract from those fabulous shoes, thus keeping the focus where it belongs: on you!



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On the right: Black Long-Sleeved Bodysuit, NASTY GAL, $52; Black Leather Midi Skirt, EXPRESS, $49; White Sandal Heels With Pink Faux Fur, ASOS, $86; Off-White Leather Moto Jacket, BCBGMAXAZRIA (Available at Bloomingdale's), $588; Multicolored Tweed Clutch, MILLY, $375; Gold Pave Crescent Moon Ring, CC SKYE (Available at Glam Boutique), $150; Pink and Lavender Pearl and Crystal Earrings, DANNIJO, $145

7. Wear your jacket on your shoulders, not on your arms.

And while you're at it, stop pulling your boyfriend jeans down around the tops of your shoes. Instead, give them a little cuff to show off your ankles, and wear them a low on your hips for a little extra slouchiness. The volume of the jacket will help balance the volume of the jeans and create a more flattering look.


On the right: Lightly Distressed Boyfriend Jeans, MAVI, $118; Leopard Print Top, SCOTCH & SODA, $79; Gray Bomber Jacket, SCOTCH & SODA; White Pumps With Ankle Strap, JEFFREY CAMPBELL, $175; Burgundy Chain Crossbody Bag, DANNIJO, $1098; Gold Two-Tier Fringe Earrings, A PEACE TREATY, $180; Two-Tone Stone Ring, A PEACE TREATY, $180; Silver Embellished Cuff, DANNIJO, $245; Gold Thin Cuff, DANNIJO, $168

8. Save the big necklaces for when you're older.

Jeweled statement necklaces are hugely popular, but they are a little costume-y and big necklaces in general are a very mature look, better suited to women in their 50s than those in their 20s. If you want to bling up a basic blouse or sweater without aging yourself 30 years, leave your neckline unadorned and try a cool ear cuff, or ring, or bangle instead. Anything, really. Except a brooch. That's some major granny territory.


On the right: Light Blue Coat, FOREVER 21, $34; White Button Down, DEMYLEE (Available at J.Crew), $170; Crystal Earcuff, ZARA, $18; Silver Pave Stack Ring, NOIR, $50

9. Stop belting your tops.

If you want to draw attention to your waist in an otherwise curve-obliterating top, your best bet is to tuck the top into a high-waisted skirt or a pair of high-waisted pants. It's a younger look and it elongates your legs, which is never a bad thing.


On the right: Black Wrap Pencil Skirt With Buttons, NASTY GAL, $78; Red Cashmere Sweater, LORD & TAYLOR, $100; Black Perforated Booties, SHOE CULT BY NASTY GAL, $130; Black Embellished Sunglasses, MIU MIU (Available at SunglassHut), $445; Black Faux-Crocodile Bag, AUXILIARY (Available at Aritzia), $325; Gold Triangle Prism Earrings, SARAH MAGID, $148; Gold Pearl Cuff, LELE SADOUGHI (Available at Net-A-Porter), $300

10. Stop pulling your shirt down over your hips.

Pulling your top down like that draws a line right across the widest part of your body and makes you look larger than you really are. It can also cause unfortunate muffin-topping on even the most toned of bodies. Instead, go for a cropped sweater to bring the attention up toward your waist and get yourself some high-rise jeans to help shape and cover you from the waist down.


On the right: Black Skinny Jeans, J BRAND, $185; Gray Cropped Sweater, CLUB MONACO, $150; Gold Geometric Pendant Necklaces, GORJANA, $88; Gold Ring With Two Stones, CC SKYE (Available at Glam Boutique), $95; Leopard Print Sneakers, SAM EDELMAN, $80; Tortoise and White Glasses, TORY BURCH, $187

10 Scents That Make You Relax When You're Stressed

No, you didn't read that wrong, jet fuel actually can make some people feel relaxed, "since it's an expected smell when you're going on vacation and traveling by plane or even by boat," Alan Hirsch, M.D., founder and neurological director of The Smell and Taste Treatment and Research Foundation of Chicago said. Certain scents, he added, trigger a chemical reaction in the brain that aids relaxation. So, if you're feeling stressed, you might want to consider just holding some (or all) of these things up to your nose for a hot minute.



1. Baby Powder


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Baby powder makes you feel calm because it can induce the primal nostalgic feeling of childhood, where you felt safe and secure.

2. Vanilla


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Vanilla not only makes people feel instantly at ease, but also is so soothing it can make you fall asleep faster. Baby bottle nipples are often infused with a vanilla scent, which, much like baby powder, can make the scent soothing into adulthood.

3. Lavender


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A study published in the International Journal of Neuroscience revealed that lavender oil has been found to affect the brain in such a way that it increases drowsiness.

4. The Scent of a Loved One


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Getting a whiff of your boyfriend or girlfriend — or even BFF — can trigger an *~iN LoVe~* feeling that our brains find soothing because of its familiarity. This response can also occur in certain places — like your bedroom at your parents' house — that you consider calming.

5. CAKE! Or Any Baked Good


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Baked goods can induce a state of relaxation because you're smelling something that is familiar, safe, secure — and obviously delicious!
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6. Cucumbers


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This aroma is said to reduce anxiety and induce relaxation, because the scent takes you back to your childhood (a less anxiety-ridden time of life) where picnics and get-togethers were more common.

7. Chamomile


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Chamomile tea has a soothing herbaceous scent that many people find calming, but Dr. Hirsch believes this is just a placebo response in many people. "It's almost like a phenomenon because people relate the scent to how they feel after drinking the tea," he says. For many of us, herbal tea = relaxing.

8. Sunscreen or Suntan Lotion


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Scents you associate with travel, like the smell of sunscreen, can often trigger a relaxed state, since they remind you of vacation, where you're relaxed.

9. Lemongrass


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Lemongrass is often used in products to help relieve stress and anxiety because it has a light, earthy scent. However, Dr. Hirsch believes that it's more so an intangible soothing feeling that people get when they smell it that induces relaxation, rather than a chemical relaxation trigger in the brain.

10. Jet Fuel


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Yes, jet fuel or even boat fuel can create an expectation for relaxation (and thus, relaxation) because you know the jet or boat is taking you somewhere that's probably more relaxing than your day-to-day life. This doesn't mean you should sit around smelling jet fuel all day long, but if you are approaching the airport or marina and feeling a little zen, this could be why.

How to Solve All Your Skin Issues in One Week

Monday
The Issue: A Tired Texture
Seventy-one percent of us experience the Sunday Blues, according to the mental-health organization Mind. Meaning, you probably spent last night stressing over today's mile-long to-do list, not snoozing a solid eight. Result: "Inflammation, dryness, and under-eye puffiness — spurred by hormones released by sleep deprivation," says Francesca Fusco, M.D., an NYC derm. In fact, a study out of University Hospitals Case Medical Center, in Cleveland, found those of us who regularly sleep less than five hours have more lines and dark spots than well-rested women.

What to Do:
Combat your skin's case of the Mondays with a depuffing eye cream (roller balls smooth the area best) and a hydrating serum spiked with brightening licorice (like Elizabeth Arden's) or vitamin C. Both fake a fresh-faced complexion.

Try these:
• Elizabeth Arden Flawless Future Caplet Serum ($60, elizabetharden.com) hydrates and brightens skin.
• Orlane Vitality Radiance Care Eye Contour ($55, orlane.com) refreshes tired eyes.

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Tuesday
The Issue: Lurking Breakouts
The most stressful moment of the week? 11:45 a.m. on Tuesday, according to a survey of 3,000 people who said that's when the real workload hits. And when anxiety skyrockets, so does oil production. But that's only part of the story. According to NYC derm Joshua Zeichner, M.D., poor sleeping patterns (a byproduct of stress) compromise your acid mantle — a thin film on the skin's surface that blocks bacteria (which runs rampant in the workplace).

What to Do:
If your instinct is to whisk away excess oil and bacteria with the strongest cleanser you can find, stop! Most soaps are alkaline, which further erodes the acid mantle. Plus, overwashing sends oil glands into overdrive. Instead, wash with a gentle cleanser made of benzoyl peroxide or salicylic acid (such as Bioré's, above); both sop up grease without disturbing the barrier.

Try this: Bioré Warming Anti-Blackhead Cleanser ($7.99, drugstores) heats up for a spa-like feel.

Wednesday
The Issue: Deeper Lines
Another study points to 3:30 p.m. on Wednesday as the time we look most haggard. No surprise, says Dr. Fusco. As we get deeper into the week, office-related aging compounds. "Repeatedly squinting at computers and phones makes crow's-feet and brow furrows look more pronounced," she explains. In addition, copy machines, microwaves, and overhead lighting all emit low-level UV rays, which break down skin-plumping collagen over time.

What to Do:
Turn down the brightness on your devices and order a glare-reducing protector for your computer screen. (The ones from 3M are affordable and effective.) Then bust out the retinol — aka the Mack Daddy of antiagers. The vitamin A compound increases collagen production. (A great one to try: Roc Multi Correxion 5 in 1 Restoring Night Cream, $24.99, drugstores.)

Thursday
The Issue: Sweet-Tooth Skin
When it comes to healthy resolutions, Monday is like January 1 and Thursday is sometime in mid-March. Seriously: A 2014 comparison of Google searches found that midweek, we don't care so much about eating right—the reason you're more likely to say "yes" to birthday cupcakes in the conference room. But your skin pays the price. In a process called glycation, sugar grabs onto skin cells' proteins and forms advanced glycation end products, explains Dr. Zeichner, laying the groundwork for saggy, dull, creased skin.

What to Do:
If carbs are your Kryptonite, reach for serums packed with peptides, says Dr. Zeichner. (Check ingredient lists for the word peptide, or try Lierac's plumping serum.) The ingredient repairs hardened fibers, leaving skin supple.

Try this: Lierac Magnificence Serum ($86, Walgreens) helps boost collagen production.

Friday
The Issue: A Calmer Complexion
Do you feel the tension just melting away? Sure, and you can probably see it too. When stress sinks, so does cortisol, the hormone linked to inflammation, increased sensitivity, and dehydration.

What to Do:
We won't ruin your Friday buzz with an elaborate routine. Just apply a BB or CC cream (aka tinted moisturizers on steroids). Both hydrate, protect with SPF, and make skin glow. If you're planning on going out tonight or tomorrow, guzzle water to prevent dehydration, advises Dr. Fusco. Two Nalgenes-full (or about 16 fluid ounces) should do the trick.

Try this: Olay Total Effects CC Cream with SPF 15 ($22.99, drugstores) protects and perfects skin instantly and over time.

Saturday
The Issue: Weekend Glow
Saturdays are all about sleeping in, doing laundry, posting last night's party pics — relaxed yet productive, sort of like your skin today. When inflammation is low, your skin works more effectively and products absorb better. And if you got lucky this morning? Go you! Orgasms flood the body with hormones and endorphins, which can reverse the damage inflicted by cortisol.

What to Do:
First, exfoliate. It helps products penetrate even better. Then, before going out, take a 15-minute disco nap with a moisturizing paper mask — it gives skin a spa-like glow.

Try these:
• Hada Labo Ultimate Anti-Aging Facial Mask ($15 for 4, hadalabotokyo.com) delivers a major dose of hyaluronic acid.
• Murad Skin Smoothing Polish ($30, murad.com) exfoliates skin with gentle jojoba beads.

Sunday
The Issue: Hangover Face
Last night's tequila shots and Avicii dance-off may have been insanely de-stressing, but "alcohol dehydrates skin and increases the production of free radicals — collagen-attacking molecules that increase lines and make skin slack," says Dr. Zeichner.

What to Do:
Like a greasy bacon-egg-and-cheese, antioxidants are the ultimate hangover cure for skin. Look for serums with tea, vitamin C, or mushroom (in Origins' serum). Later, when you're watching True Blood, treat yourself to an LED session (more on that below), then hit the sheets in a sleeping mask (also above).

Try these:
• Lancôme Energie de Vie Nuit ($65, sephora.com) hydrates as you snooze.
• Origins Advanced Face Serum ($71, origins.com) fends off free radicals.

Other Skin Fixes:

Red-Light LED Treatments
Once limited to spas and derm offices, red-light LED treatments — now available from handheld, at-home devices cleared by the FDA (like Tanda's) — give skin a timed dose of infrared light. Although painless, the injury this energy causes leads the body to produce extra collagen and elastin to heal itself.

Tanda Luxe Skin Rejuvenation Photofacial Device, $99.97, walmart.com

Skin Therapy
"We've always known that stress impacts skin, but new research is giving us a much clearer picture of what's actually going on," says Richard Fried, M.D., Ph.D., a dermatologist and psychologist (cool combo, right?) in Pennsylvania. Any stress — deadlines, breakups, general dissatisfaction — causes skin to release neuropeptides, tiny proteins that, when triggered by stress, cause conditions like acne, psoriasis, and eczema flare-ups. "More and more derms are finding that lifestyle adjustments, in addition to topical products, are the most effective way to treat these issues," says Dr. Fried. So what's the therapist's antistress Rx?

1. Stick to a schedule. Do your best to adhere to diet, exercise, and skin resolutions, even if every fiber in your body wants to skip the gym, pig out, and hit the sack without washing your face.

2. Relax. If meditation is your bag, an app like Headspace (free for Apple iOS and Android) makes it easy to get started. But really any activity that helps you kick back — including sex, New Girl marathons, or walking your pup — will help.

3. Don't pick ... or prod, pop, or peel. Stress causes us to be hyperfocused on skin's imperfections. Step away from the magnifying mirror, and allow things to clear.

9 Beauty Fails That Mess With Your Skin (and How to Fix Them)

1. Staying up past midnight.
What's the big deal? Late-night partying — or just blowing through your Netflix queue — causes more than dark circles. A recent study noted sleep-deprived women (those who fall into the "poor" category of the Pittsburgh Sleep Quality Index) age faster than those who catch enough Zs. The theory: Skin-repair rates lag with less sleep, causing lines, spots, and slack skin.

The fix: Studies show the antioxidant resveratrol, found in grapes and red wine (and in Chanel's serum, here) not only amps up skin's ability to mend itself but also gets your body to create its own antioxidants, says NYC derm Joshua Zeichner, M.D. Apply at night, when skin is in repair mode.

Try: Chanel Le Lift Firming Anti-Wrinkle Sérum, $175, Chanel.com.

2. Owning the urban jungle.
What's the big deal? Smog is hell on skin, thanks to a toxic duo of ozone (a noxious gas created when fumes, like car exhaust, mingle with sunlight) and particulate matter (bits of soot and liquid drops of acids and chemicals that float in the air). The first destroys lipids and proteins, causing irritation and breakouts; the latter, ranging in size from about 2.5 to 10 micrometers (one-seventh the width of a hair), "gets into pores, where it spurs inflammation and free radicals, leading to spots and lines," says dermatologist Fredric Brandt, M.D. In fact, a study found women who lived in high-traffic areas had 20 percent more pigmentation.

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The fix: Give smog a p.m. smackdown with a high-tech cleansing brush, says derm Jeannette Graf, M.D. In a clinical test against particulate matter, Clarisonic's (here), with its oscillating bristles that move 300 times per second, cleared pores 30 times better than hands.

Try: Clarisonic Smart Profile, $265, Clarisonic.com for locations.

3. Blowing off a cardio session.
What's the big deal? Exercise can keep you looking younger longer. One study shows that those who get sweaty on the reg (at least 14 minutes per day) have longer telomeres — protective bumpers on the ends of our DNA strands, which naturally shorten over time. Researchers believe that if you can delay this shortening process, you may delay the signs of aging.

The fix: The closest thing to a workout-in-a-bottle: Telo-5, a new antiaging system (used in Kate Somerville's cream, above) based on Nobel Prize-winning research on telomere preservation, and Juvenessence, a peptide technology (find it in Dr. Brandt Do Not Age Time Reversing Cream, $130, Sephora.com). Topical DNA-repair enzymes like plankton (found in Neova DNA Total Repair, $99, Neova.com) might also be key. "In theory, they should be able to repair telomeres along with other DNA," says Dr. Zeichner.

Try: Kate Somerville Age Arrest Anti-Wrinkle Cream, $90, katesomerville.com.

4.  Loving cocktail o'clock.
What's the big deal? More than two drinks can be a buzzkill for skin. Alcohol creates free radicals and ups inflammation. It's also a diuretic and a vasodilator, leaving skin dry, puffy, and flushed. Social smoker? You'll likely wake up to a washed-out or grayish skin tone. "Just one cigarette drastically reduces the oxygen levels in your skin, hindering circulation," says Dr. Graf.

The fix: A cocktail of super-potent antioxidants (like vitamins A, C, and E — in Aveeno's moisturizer, right) will neutralize free radicals before they can do damage. Also, in the a.m., pop an anti-inflammatory ibuprofen to reduce the flush in your face, says Dr. Brandt. To help skin rebound from smoke-induced oxygen loss, reach for a serum rich in saccharomyces lysate (in Avon's, right), a yeast extract that helps restore cell respiratory function, says Dr. Graf.

Try: Avon Anew Genics Treatment Concentrate, $45, Avon.com. Aveeno Smart Essentials Daily Nourishing Moisturizer With Broad Spectrum SPF 30, $10, drugstores.

5. Driving without protection.
What's the big deal? Unless you have seriously tinted windows, UVA rays — responsible for lines, pigmentation, and all three types of skin cancer — can penetrate glass and damage skin cells year-round, explains Dr. Zeichner. Studies show that both sun-induced skin damage (like wrinkles and spots) and skin cancers appear more on the left (or driver's) side of our faces.

The fix: When it comes to UV damage, nothing defends like sunscreen. Titanium dioxide-based blocks (like the one at left) start deflecting rays the second they're applied. (Chemical sunscreens, on the other hand, require 15 minutes to soak into skin — not ideal if you tend to run late in the morning.) Remember: Any form of SPF needs to be reapplied every two hours, so tote a mini in your purse (not in your car though — high temps can deactivate the ingredients in the formula) and apply before your ride home.

Try: Orgo Completely Weightless SPF 29 Sunscreen Face Spray, $32, BeautyCirque.com.

6. Busting your ass at work.
What's the big deal? Fingers crossed, your killer work ethic will soon land you a fat promotion and raise, but all that day-to-day stress can lead to breakouts. Stress triggers the production of androgens — a hormone proven to increase oil production, which leads to clogged pores, says Dr. Brandt.

The fix: Before bed, wash with a cleanser made of 2 percent salicylic acid (new and amazing: Olay Fresh Effects Clear Skin Acne Hater Deep Scrub, $7, drugstores), letting it absorb like a mask for three minutes. The next day, apply a lotion with less potent, but still effective, levels of the ingredient (like Lancôme's, below, which also mattifies shine). If you need to up the ante, your derm can prescribe the Pill (like Yaz) or an anti-androgen med to balance hormones.

Try: Lancôme Bienfait Pure Focus Matifying Moisturizing Lotion, $46, Lancome.com.

7. Gulping down green juice.
What's the big deal? ODing on antioxidant-rich veggies can be healthy for skin — unless they're all you're ingesting. "A multiday cleanse deprives skin of oils rich in essential and omega fatty acids, found at high levels in foods such as salmon and nuts," says Dr. Brandt. Depriving yourself, even just for a few days, can lead to noticeably dull, dehydrated skin.

The fix: Get back your glow with a fatty-acid-packed moisturizer. The most effective ingredient, according to derms: ceramides (in the Algenist oil above), which naturally cushion our skin cells in the outermost layer of skin. "When deposited topically, they act as powerful emollients, restoring hydration and luminosity," says Dr. Brandt.

Try: Algenist Advanced Anti-Aging Repairing Oil, $79, Sephora.com.

8. Basking in the heat.
What's the big deal? Whether you're in the sun or not, "heat alone is enough to trigger brown spots," says Dr. Brandt. High temps — anything above 90 degrees — spur inflammation and free radicals (oxygen molecules that mess with normal cell function), kicking pigment-making melanocyte cells into overdrive.

The fix: Stop the skin damage before it can even start. Ingredients such as kojic acid (in the Bliss serum, right) and mulberry (found in Olay's overnight mask, here) are called tyrosinase inhibitors. They work by blocking the enzyme responsible for stimulating melanin so that hyperpigmentation will never get a chance to show up on your skin, says Dr. Zeichner.

Try: Blisslabs Active 99.0 Essential Active Serum, $160, BlissWorld.com. Olay Regenerist Luminous Overnight Mask, $26, drugstores.

9. The 3 p.m. soda addiction.
What's the big deal? Your guilty pleasure isn't just full of wrinkle-inducing sugar (yes, sweet stuff contributes to aging), it's also highly acidic, says Dr. Graf. Healthy skin cells are formed when our internal systems are balanced at an alkaline (read: nonacidic) pH. When the environment is too acidic, cells produce less healthy offspring, causing everything from flakes to pigmentation problems to deep wrinkles.

The fix: Switch to a clear bev (dark soda contains more acid-producing phosphorous), says Dr. Graf. Or spike the dark stuff with alkaline-producing lemon. Moisture-attracting humectants, like glycerin or hyaluronic acid (in Garnier's and Philosophy's, respectively), help strengthen weak skin cells.

Here Are the Secrets to Treating All of Your Breakouts

Repeat breakouts can seem like a mystery. In the search for answers, Western derms— armed with their prescription pads—are increasingly taking a holistic approach. "We're reading the skin for clues about what's going on inside the body," explains Ellen Marmur, MD, founder of Marmur Medical and associate clinical professor of dermatology at Mount Sinai Medical Center in NYC. This new age view is actually really old: Traditional Chinese medicine has been using the face as a diagnostic tool for centuries. "It's a science of observation, where parts of the face correspond to different internal organs, similar to foot reflexology," explains Lillian Pearl Bridges, author of Face Reading in Chinese Medicine. Our zone-focused guide reveals the internal and external reasons behind your breakouts.

Forehead and hairline

Inner trigger. This area connects to the digestive system, and breakouts here could suggest you're eating like a teenage boy. "Studies have found that milk products, processed foods, sugar, and carbs make acne worse," says Dr. Marmur.
How to deal. "Keep a food diary, and if you notice that you've been eating a lot of dairy or junk food, cut it out for a week and see if your blemishes improve," says Bridges.
Outer behavior. "Hair that rests on your skin is a prime pimple-maker because the silicones and oils in hair products clog the pores," says Cybele Fishman, MD, integrative dermatologist and assistant clinical professor of dermatology at Mount Sinai Medical Center in New York City.
How to deal. Each morning, give skin a fresh start with an antiacne cleanser (like Glytone's), and keep blotting papers on hand for midday greasies. At night, use a cleansing wipe with salicylic acid to decongest pores (try Dr. Lin's), and pin back bangs if you have them.

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Around the eyebrows

Inner trigger. These breakouts link to the liver and kidneys. "Drinking alcohol often and eating processed foods regularly can cause inflammation in the body that often shows up on the skin here," says Dr. Marmur.
How to deal. Time to detox, party girl. "Daily green juices with kale, spinach, and cucumber help detoxify the liver and rehydrate the body, and drinking water with lemon flushes out impurities to clear the skin," says Bridges.
Outer behavior. Do you break out after getting your brows waxed, threaded, or tweezed? Ripping out those hairs can cause inflammatory acne.
How to deal. Use honey as a skin-calming spot treatment. "Raw manuka honey is naturally anti-inflammatory and antibacterial, and since it's a humectant, it's not drying," explains Dr. Fishman. Sounds weird, but it works. Leave it on for 15 minutes, then rinse.

Cheeks

Inner trigger. This area relates to the lungs, so pimples here could be due to pollution or smoking. "Both increase oxidative stress, which exacerbates acne," says Dr. Fishman.
How to deal. Antioxidants help counteract the harmful free radicals that stir up inflammation, and a recent study showed that topical and oral antioxidants might actually help prevent breakouts. Apply an antioxidant serum every day (Juice Beauty's has potent green and white teas), and try a zinc supplement—it's been shown to calm inflammation in the skin.
Outer behavior. Your makeup or skin care may be the prob. "Silicone and oil, even good-for-you ones like coconut, can plug pores," says Dr. Fishman. Another suspect: your bacteria-laden cell phone.
How to deal. Keep pores clear with oil-free, noncomedogenic products, never sleep in your makeup, and wipe that iPhone clean (or at least use earbuds)

Jawline and chin

Inner trigger. According to both Eastern and Western medicine, pimples here indicate out-of-whack hormones. "Premenstrual fluctuations in estrogen and testosterone activate acne eruptions," says Dr. Marmur.
How to deal. Talk to your MD about going on birth-control pills, which help regulate hormone levels. In lieu of this, Dr. Fishman often prescribes Spironolactone, a pill that blocks testosterone's effect on oil production.
Outer behavior. Do you always rest your chin in your hands? That bacteria transfers right onto your face. "And if you tend to pick at your skin, this inflames the area and makes pimples worse," says Dr. Marmur.
How to deal. Hands off! Put reminder Post-its on your computer or bathroom mirror if you have to. Another way to preempt spots: A week before your period, use a mild exfoliating cleanser (like Neutrogena) every other night. As for those existing zits? Dab on a salicylic-acid spot treatment (try Clean & Clear)—it roots out oil.

Nose

Inner trigger. In traditional Chinese medicine, the center of the face is associated with the heart. Any redness and blemishes here may be stress-related, says Dr. Marmur.
How to deal. Try stress-relievers like deep breathing, meditation, and yoga. And make sure to get enough rest and exercise to reduce excess cortisol and calm your skin.
Outer behavior. "Since there are a lot of oil glands on the nose, it's prime territory for acne," says Dr. Fishman.
How to deal. Salicylic-acid products are great for keeping grease at bay, but Dr. Fishman also recommends sulfur to cut oil and inflammation. Apply a sulfer mask twice weekly to keep your T-zone clear.